Fear happens.  Our brains are hard-wired to be on constant alert for threats to our survival.  Once fear detects a threat, worry follows fear.  

No matter what’s happening in your life, the most stressful thing you deal with are the conversations you have with yourself inside your own brain about your past, present or future

Life in the 21st century is scary.   The 24/7 cycle we are all on.    With the proliferation of technology and social media impacting our professional and personal lives , figuring out how to handle the stress is more complicated than ever before.  Where to begin?  With your own inner thoughts, your monkey mind, your worry.  It all starts with you.

Your negative thoughts about everything in your life create your experience of what is happening.  How to control them?

The conversations you have with yourself are the one thing that you can control 



Begin by breathing in and out slowly.  Right now.  Sit up straight.  Smile.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Sit up straight and smile.

Seriously.  That’s it.  It has been scientifically proven (Mirroring People,  by Marco Iacoboni, 2008) that smiling creates positive responses deep within the brain of the person smiling, as well as any one looking at the person who is smiling.

What most people worry about boils down to:

  1.  I/he/she/they are not good enough.
  2.  I am in this alone/I will get old alone.
  3.  The future is dark and filled with negative outcomes.
  4. The past is right here right now and the pain still affects me in profoundly negative ways and I hope I don’t screw up the future.

Breathing feeds the brain much needed oxygen and slows down the heart rate, calming the entire nervous system.


Sitting up straight.  Because you shouldn’t schlump.

Think about breathing.  Think about smiling.  Think about sitting up straight.  Breathe.  Smile.  Sit up straight.

Have you worried in the past minute?  No.   Why?  Because you made a conscious decision to breathe, smile and sit up straight and focused your attention.


  1.  Fear happens.  2.  Worry follows.  3.  Worry are negative thoughts.  4.  You can control your thoughts by observing your fear and worry, breathing in and out, smiling and calming your body’s fear reactions and worried thoughts.
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